Posts

07.24.25

 I haven't posted in what must be several years now for I-don't-know-why. I suppose because, 'why would I?'. But after scrounging through pages and pages of defunct family blogs I suddenly have the urge to record myself.         I start college in a few weeks, and I am nervous about so many things. It doesn't feel real to me, and yet it feels far too realistic to be what I have dreamt about for so long. Not getting to go to Portland truly feels life ending, in the dumbest way possible. I know I put too much of my hopes and dreams in to that place, but it feels as though I was so, so very close to achieving the life I have been longing for for so long and then I once again threw it away by being practical. Being realistic and smart about my decisions it seems has only brought me pain. I am still waiting for the supposed day it'll all pay off, but I lose hope each passing year and I find myself wishing I could knowingly make bad decisions.     ...

Sleepover with M

      M came over last Friday for a sleepover and it was tons of fun! We walked to the convenience store, watched Kikis delivery service and ate wayyy too many snacks :) It was a lot of fun, and I hope M feels the same way. The next day we went swimming and watched Onward while eating ramen. She left at around 7, and we are going to go to the movies next Wednesday to watch Howls Moving Castle. Im super excited :))))

Multiple life updates

          Omg it has been so long since I've updated! A lot has happened in my life since February! It is currently September 15, 2022. First starters, I'm 16 now! I got my permit over summer break, but I've only driven one hour... Oops. Anyway, summer was cool, but very boring lol. I went swimming a lot with M which was super fun :D          School started back a little more than a month ago. Its funny reading all my entry's from last year stressing about getting in dual enrollment and beta club lol. I'm in both now, and dual enrollment is a lot of work, but I guess I expected that! I am also running a book club in beta club and I am the "Sargent of arms" for the 9th graders. Also, I'm the communications person in student council. And I am in a 'leadership' class at school. And honors geometry. And AP enviro science. Lolol I am very busy this year...      Anyway, some really good things have happe...

Congaree and South Carolina trip :)

      I spent this past week on a field study to Congaree national park, and another area in South Carolina! It was loads of fun!! On the first night there we walked all around the city we were staying in, the next day we visited an old battle ship and then kayaked out to a tiny island off the coast. The island was probably my favorite part of the whole trip :) There were loads of dead stuff, including whole horseshoe crabs, which was super interesting! I also found some coral fossils and shark teeth. After the island we went shopping in the city we were in and did an impromptu tour of the local college. The next day we visited Angel Oak, one of the largest trees in the US. It was really incredible!! Then we went to the only tea garden in the US, toured it, and I bought some green tea, wildflower honey, and some green tea flavored candies. After that we drove the Columbus and hiked a trail at Congaree, which was super beautiful. The next morning we woke up super earl...

Naomi's Birthday!!

      Today was Naomi's birthday!! It was a lot of fun :) We went to get pizza and Locksley made her a cake! Tomorrow we are going to go spend out gift cards from Grandmom, and I will try to buy her something then. She got the newest Sonic game from Ruby and Johnathan, and Locksley promised to take her to the new Sonic movie when it comes out in April. I feel a bit bad though because I feel we didn't do very much, but still I think she had fun and hopefully I will find something to give her tomorrow. Actually, I just remembered we are going to go to Nina's to have cake too! Hopefully Nina got her something she will enjoy :) I have a feeling she is doing something for her involving hair... ~*~* Esther *~*~

1.25.22

      I've been thinking today, and I've come to the conclusion that I actually am really proud of where I am both mentally, and in life in general. If you had told me in elementary school that I would have a friend group (multiple friends!!) that was actually nice to me, I am getting my drivers permit very soon, I will be in dual enrollment next year, I am going on over night school trips, AND school is my number one priority, I would have never believed it. Especially that last part. All my life I had gotten good grades, but never because I cared enough to try. I always had more important things to worry about; even as a child I didn't have the time or mental capacity to care about school, so it being my number one priority (like it should be for a child/ teenager) is really mind blowing. I really am proud and grateful that my life has progressed so much :)

1.23.22

 Hello again :) There has been a lot happening recently and I felt like getting on here and typing it all out!      To start, during Christmas break I got covid :( It sucked, but luckily I didn't get it too bad. Then, school was online for a few weeks because SO MANY people have covid. It makes me really angry that the government cares so little about it's people, specifically it's students.. Anyway, I want to talk about school now! In February I will be joining the Beta club, so I am very excited! And, next year I will be starting duel enrollment courses!! Those are both things I had dreamt of, and worked really hard in hopes of, but being the pessimist I am, I assumed those plans would fall through (i'm still pretty worried about duel enrollment falling through) so it's really really cool that these opportunities are happening now! Also, I will hopefully be getting my permit very soon. I have been studying non stop these past couple of weeks, and all I need is...